Friday, October 16, 2009

What do your "friends" say when your not around...

Have you ever wondered how your so-called friends talk to others about you? I have on occasion..but I never really made a big deal about it.

Well, last night I was catching up on the phone with a friend and after about an hour, my battery started to die. I told her I needed to let my phone charge and that I would call her back.

Her disabled and sometimes absent minded father was in the room at the time.

Well just as I was about to hang up, I realized she hadn't hung up her cell yet. I heard her say, "that was my friend remember Elise, right dad?"

At that moment, I could have hung up the phone but I didn't. I wanted to know how my friend would describe me to her father.

She went on to tell her dad about my recent move to NC and my reason for moving to the Gulf Coast three years ago. She remembered things that I forgot we even discussed. I was amazed at how much she remembered over the course of our year-long friendship. I was also impressed that she didn't share any personal things about my life or my work-life.

I've been around her dad a couple of times but because of his illness, he was still having a tough time figuring out who I am.

My friend went on to tell him that I was really tall and exotic looking (exotic...who me!?!) I had to mute my phone because I thought that was hilarious. The funny part is that he then remembered who I was.

"Oh, the tall pretty black girl from Atlanta," he said.

"Yeah, yeah. That's her. That's Elise," my friend responded.

The interesting part was that my friend never used my race as a descriptive....and she only used my job because that's how me met.

The three things I remember her saying was that I was smart, fun and pretty.

I listened in about two minutes before hanging up. But I probably won't tell her that I eavesdropped on her conversation. And I probably will never do it again...the results could have been much different. I just think it's interesting to hear how people talk about you when your NOT around.
It let me know what kind of impression I have left on a woman whom I look up to.

My friend is extremely smart. She quotes scholars on a regular but can laugh about the simplest things. She is a gifted education teacher and is currently working on her doctorate. She hates living on the coast but moved back to help her mother care for her ailing father and for that, she showed how loyal and caring she is.

She reads all the time and doesn't have the Internet at home. She only goes online at work when she's checking email or sending newsletters to parents. Yet, she is cultured and up-to-speed on everything that's going on in the world. She's not the best when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex...but neither am I. We have the best conversations about politics even though she calls me a conservative democrat. HA!

I could go on and on...but that's what I would say about my friend behind her back. What would you say about yours? ♥Elise

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